Apparently today is some sort of orientation for new sales folk. They’re causing all sorts of ruckus on 24, which was cool until one dumbass girl walked past my cubicle (unable to see me) and said, “Yeah, this is the Editorial floor. As you can see, no one’s here because they never come to work.”
Excuse me? Just because we wear sweat pants and watch The X-Files whilst working, doesn’t mean we’re not getting shit done. I’d like to see you write a billion different jokes about car washes and Brazilian waxes per day, ma’m.
Bra optional.
Who in the hell gets gout?
[video]
I know how sad it is to post about this, but I found this new brand of oatmeal that I really really love because 1) it has cool packaging; 2) even their organic flavors are dirt cheap (and delicous); and 3) this.
After living in my apartment for a good 7 months now, I’ve finally gotten around to organizing my fridge. Gone are the days of tossing things in there without taking them out of the grocery bag first….I think.
The remnants after a long, long evening of cooking, eating, drinking, and chess playing.
It’s very embarrassing when you wear new sandals to work, and they squeak every time you take a step and you start to feel like a mom at a pool.
Boyf
Meanwhile, in Australia:
A possum broke into a bakery and ate so many pastries it couldn’t move. This is how they found him!
I’ve been taking a boot camp class for the past month or so (I’m ripped now btw) and this morning the instructor said something very obvious…and quite frankly, pretty stupid. Yet, I just can’t get it out of my mind: “10 out of 10 people die.”
In my head, I was thinking, “Dang. That’s so deep. I am going to die one day. It’s completely out of my control. Gosh, I hope it’s not while I’m doing burpees. That would be a major downer.”
This post is moronic. I’m also really sleepy and tired of writing about salt caves and what not. And I wish I was in Las Vegas with Birdman. Not the rapper; that’s what my brother calls my boyfriend. Because he looks like Big Bird. I hope he doesn’t read this.
Onward.